Merriam-Webster defines atheist and agnostic as
Atheist - a person who does not believe in the existence of a god or any gods
Agnostic - a person who holds the view that any ultimate reality (such as God) is unknown and probably unknowable
I have toggled back and forth between identifying as an atheist or agnostic for much of my adult life, although I generally considered my more agnostic leanings a reflection of a belief that while there must be some sort of force that exists that is not able to be understood by humans, our definition of God could not be accurate, that God could not be anything like what we have constructed in our minds and through our religions. And that certainly, there is no religion (or religious definition of God) that is any better than any other.
So, imagine my surprise when I was recently contacted by The Almighty.
At first I thought I was having a lucid dream. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term, a lucid dream is one in which you are aware that you are dreaming thereby allowing you to influence or control the content or narrative of the dream. While I fly in my dreams more infrequently than when I was a younger adult, flying defined as soaring through the air like superman, I invariably knew I was dreaming while in the air. I was lucid dreaming during those flights.
As I said, at first I thought it was a lucid dream as I have often mused and even written about an encounter with The Almighty. But in this instance, that wasn't the case. For whatever reason, The Almighty had chosen to initiate a communication with me.
"Joe, it is The Almighty. I want to spend some time with you, if that is OK. I hope you will allow me to dominate the conversation but I will endeavor to entertain questions, if there is time."
The sound of the words were very clear, neither commanding nor with a deep resonant base kind of sound as one might expect, but very clear, as if reflecting a confidence. Not obviously a man or woman's voice either, so perhaps "voice" is more a function of a limited perception of communication. As I reflect upon it now, it may have been more of an ESP kind of thing.
But as I did so, I was a bit taken aback when I focused on the phrase "if there is time", as the thought flashed through my mind that perhaps this was the actual last moments of life, and that my "time" was limited because, well, my time was up.
"No Joe, you are not about to die. It is just that I generally find that these kinds of communications stress the human mind to a degree that they can only last a short time."
"First, I want you to know that I have not abandoned Earth, or Man, or whatever you might refer to as everything going on in the world today. I know your thoughts have moved in that direction, especially these last few weeks, this last decade. Of course, for me, the passage of a decade, or even a century, let alone a few weeks is practically instantaneous, but even so, I am aware of the trends taking place on Earth and I can assure you that I am not missing in action, or off creating life somewhere else in the universe, or just sitting back and waiting for the chips to fall as they may."
"But there is such killing going on", I blurted out, hoping this statement reflected my real question; why did The Almighty allow such death and destruction as was occurring in the Middle East and Eastern Europe, let alone the multiple atrocities that are hidden from the media outlets which most of us access.
"Life is both complicated, and simple. Complicated because of how long it has taken for humans to have become what they are today through the stops and starts of life as it has evolved. And even more complicated because of the slow progress by humans as they have adapted to the environment, learned about the immense variety of species that I have also provided, sought comfort in ever increasing sizes of groups, began to wander about and explore the immense space outside their home planet."
"To be honest, it's been very rewarding to see the progress, the development of what you define as justice, fairness, the respect for life, animal as well as human. Of course, there is still a very long way to go, but I am pleased, in general."
"In essence, that is what makes life simple. You might call it the golden rule, treating others as you wish to be treated. For all the talk about the indoctrination of children towards a more secular perception, treating others as you would like to be treated does not require an association with a religion, just a belief that we should treat each other humanely."
"While I have said that I am pleased with the progress, again, you must understand that my timeline is rather large compared to any civilization's, let alone any one person's. There has been ebb and flow, the pendulum has swung, sometimes rather drastically, in the wrong direction. And I am not just referring to the events of thousands of years ago, but also to events that have transpired even during the lifetimes of many people alive today."
"So, while pleased with the progress, there is a paradigm shift that is ongoing, that has been ongoing, for a while now. A shift that perhaps seems fairly drastic in the way that humans perceive the passage of time, but not so critical when my timeline is referenced."
"You see, that is the rub, as they say. While I am fully aware of even the most infinitesimal of changes in human development, I am also aware that this process has a timeline of hundreds of thousands of years. For that reason, I am a bit more patient before taking any active involvement."
"To be blunt, one might even say that I am reluctant to intervene because I know that I have provided the proper environment, Earth as you call it, the proper spiritual inspiration, Jesus, Buddha, Mohamed, etc, the requisite mental and physical traits, and, a plethora of possible experiences, joys, and sorrows, that there really shouldn't be the need for me to do more. Without giving too much away, the need hasn't been required in the past with any great frequency."
"Joe, I don't allow war, genocide, brutality, humans do. The real question is why do you allow it, and even more importantly, why do you allow it in My name so often."
"Is there a heaven?", I exclaimed.
There was a pause, brief, but tangible, then
"I will answer that, with the understanding that if humans accept that good and evil emanates from them, and that they should know the difference, then there must be a reward and a punishment for behaving one way or the other. So, yes, heaven and hell do exist but not as humans imagine it. The reward for a life lived as the great spiritual masters have described is far more amazing than anything you can imagine, as is the punishment for turning one's back on those lessons."
"To
be honest, if I were to provide the knowledge of what comes after death while you live, the actual reality of each choice, no one would choose hell over heaven. Frankly, most people really don't believe in heaven or hell, despite their declarations that they do, or things like genocide and bombing schools and hospitals, wouldn't exist."
"Why are you communicating with me?", I asked.
"A fair question, but again, one which reveals the inherent misconception that permeates all religions, that only a small percentage of humans can speak for me, or be contacted by me. All my children have the capacity for good, hence they all have the capacity to communicate what is right and what is wrong. Of course, having that capacity doesn't mean everyone chooses the correct path, or that people should listen to just anyone."
"In your case, you wrote a story called The Line. Do you recall it?"
I thought for a few seconds, remembering the title, but not the story. "No, I really can't remember it's details," I responded.
Suddenly, there is was, in my mind's eye.
The Line
Less scrambling for wealth and more helping those less fortunate than ourselves. Less trumpeting ways in which we are better than others and more recognition that the birth lottery was good to us, now how can we progress the lives of those not so lucky. Less finding reasons to distrust, isolate and kill, more searching for ways to bridge our differences; more love, less hate.
What if, at the end of the day, it is simply a matter of how many we've helped, not how much we've earned?
--------
The rain pelted the windshield making visibility very limited. There was no place to pull over, so I continued on, slowly. At a blind curve, two headlights lit up the night, temporarily turning the darkness into light. The collision occurred almost simultaneously just as my eyes recovered from the sudden light providing no time to react. The car teetered momentarily at the cliff's edge, then slid down the ravine into the shallow water below. Funny, I thought, no pain.
The line stretched out in front of me to a point where I could still make out the colors of clothes but not the faces of their wearers. There was a bit of chatter around me but it all sounded forced like the interactions one hears in an elevator. I chose to remain silent, only nodding my head at the woman in front of me when she turned around and smiled the smile one sees in line at the grocery store. Or at a funeral.
Gradually, we shuffled forward. We didn't seem to be moving very quickly yet I didn't sense the impatience one usually feels from a group stuck in a slowly moving, long line. I wondered if they all felt as I did, a feeling that the time would come, soon enough, when we would find ourselves at the front of the line. I heard a short, suppressed laugh in the distance behind me. It was a laugh that seemed to have been stopped short, not just by its owner but by the group as a whole, as if to remind everyone in line that this was not the place for laughter.
After a while, more than minutes but less than hours, I was surprised to find that I had a folder tucked under my arm. I glanced around me and noticed that everyone else also carried a similar folder. No one had opened their package and I followed suit.
More time passed and I was beginning to hear the words being spoken at the front of the line. Well, not really actual words, but voices. Soon I realized that every other voice seemed to be of the same pitch and eventually I understood that each conversation featured the voice of someone in line, like me, and the response from the person who was waiting for us. All of the conversations were brief.
For the second time since I had found myself in line, I was surprised. This time, my surprise was the result of realizing that there were two additional lines leading away from the front of the line in which I waited. How could I have missed them before? One moved very slowly and was extremely crowded. It disappeared into the distance and I got the sense that it did not end just out of sight. The second line was sparsely populated and the people moving within it were free to stride or trot or walk casually as they felt. I noticed that all those around me were also aware of the two lines. I imagined that they wished as I did, to be allowed to join those in that second line.
When I turned my attention back towards the front of my line, I could now clearly see the people as they approached the man whose voice I first detected. He was tall and lean, clothed in loose garb. There was nothing special about his clothes but he obviously commanded the attention of each person who approached him. As each individual personal drama played out, the tall man nodded, each person opened their folder, glanced at the words inside then handed the folder to the man. I heard each person say something, heard his voice respond, then watched as the majority of them walked off to the first, much longer line.
I was getting close now. I should have been close enough to hear the words but for some reason I could not. Yet I could tell that most of the conversations were not ending in the manner that was anticipated. While there was no anger being expressed, there was clearly disappointment of the kind that comes when an outcome is exactly opposite of expectation.
Then, despite the fact that I felt that I had been in line for quite a while, I was suddenly at the front of the line. It reminded me of the conversations that I had had with my grandparents when I was a young adult and they in the twilight of their lives. Time can seem interminable, they all said, yet your life can seem so short, and the time of inevitable death can seem so sudden.
I looked up at the man at the front of the line. He was taller than I had calculated while I was standing in line. But it wasn't his height that was his most striking feature. It was his eyes. They were direct, compassionate, and sad. I had seen similar expressions during conversations where tragic news was being relayed. But his sadness went beyond the sadness that comes from just bringing bad news; his sadness seemed to reflect a responsibility in that he had provided the way to avoid this bad news but it had been ignored. He was obviously reading judgements yet these judgements were far from the judicial impartiality that we expect in our courts. He was visibly saddened by the decisions he was rendering.
I opened my folder and found one piece of paper with a sentence in very large print. It said, YOU MAY ASK ONE QUESTION. Below that line were other words in a language that I did not understand but clearly conveyed something to the man.
"How do you earn the right to take the second line?", I asked.
"You made your choice of which line you would walk every day of your life. You earned time on Line Two every time you performed an act of kindness, doubly so when done for someone you didn't know or who was different from yourself. You earned time on Line Two when your life reflected the spirit of your beliefs, when you were nice when it was hard to be nice, and when you defended someone being treated unjustly. You earned time on Line Two when you used the abilities that you were born with to help those less fortunate than yourself."
"You earned time on Line One when you made choices to benefit yourself regardless of its effect on others. You earned time on Line One when you used your religion to define who to love and who to hate. And you earned time on Line One when you did nothing even though you knew what was right but deferred action to someone else. You earned time on Line One when you used the abilities that you were born with to help only yourself."
"I told you how to live, did you not listen? So many men carrying the message of love, did you not heed them? So much suffering to help ease, did you not see it?"
I reflected on my life in an attempt to calculate which line I had earned through my actions and in-actions. I glanced up at the man at the front of the line and moved towards the line he indicated.
"Which
brings me to the theory that good works can't get you to heaven. I am
not sure why it is so foundational in many religions and religious
books, but that is one of the fallacies of a human created version of
heaven. Being kind to others, especially those who are different from
you in appearance, culture, perspective, even values, is the most
difficult way for someone to live, and the trait I value over any
other."
"Or, to put more simply, it is easy to treat people well when they are like yourself, when they are your family, or when they share some basic values or perspective, but far more difficult to treat those unlike yourself fairly and with humanity."
"Not for the first time, probably not for the last, there is a selfishness of action that has begun to permeate man's interactions with each other at a level that is making it more difficult for people to listen to the good within themselves, and to judge whether their leaders messages and policies reflect that same goodness. There is confusion and chaos which causes fear, which inspires behavior that rejects kindness while embracing blame and cruelty."
"Will we get past this cycle?"
"The Earth is billions of years old. Life has existed for millions of years, and will always exist is some form with or without humans. If I said it doesn't matter, would you consider ill of me, as if I didn't care if humanity prospers, or merely survives, or is extinguished? If you consider my time line, the veritable eternity that I have been in existence, and the endless time ahead, you might forgive me for such a nonchalant attitude."
"But know this, it is not the big picture of humanity existing for 100 or 1000 or 10,0000 more years that matters compared to how each person is judged."
"Have you reflected the best of what I instilled in each of you? Or have you ignored the lessons handed down through history from those who were able to fully tap into the goodness I imprinted in everyone?"
"Each of you will earn whatever fate comes your way, as will every person you encounter as well as every person unknown to you, and combined, those actions will enable humanity to exist for centuries, or for decades. But regardless, the Earth will circle the sun for far longer, and the sun will radiate light and heat for even longer still, yet that will still be only a fraction of the time of my existence."
"In that way, the cycle you refer to is inconsequential, in the bigger perspective of time without end."
"But if nothing matters, then what is the point?"
"Did I say nothing mattered? Everything you do matters, everything everyone does matters, every action and inaction. I said earlier that I value good works, especially those conferred upon people unlike oneself."
"But just as powerful are the in-actions we engage in when we turn our heads rather than see injustice, or stay quiet when we know someone is harming others in words or deeds, in fear that if we speak up, we might be next. Or worse, by thinking we won't be next because our looks, or beliefs, or opinions, mirror those of the oppressor."
"To repeat a phrase that you are familiar with, due to your particular upbringing, what you do unto the least of them, you do unto me. That is a very powerful statement, and one which is extremely difficult to live as one's guiding maxim."
"The point is to leave the world a better place through actions you perform and in-actions you reject."
"The point is to strive to be the best version of being human that you can knowing you will fail, often, but acknowledging those failures, and doing even better when the next opportunity arises."
"The point is to live by giving and receiving as much love as you can both to those in your life, your family, your neighbors, your co-workers, your friends, and to those outside your circle. Or maybe a better way to explain it is to make your particular circle of love as immense as you can. As big as the Earth itself, if possible."
With that, the communication ended. I spent the next hour or so trying to remember and record as much as I could before the memory faded as I feared that perhaps part of the process was that I would forget the encounter. That doubt as to source of such a dialogue was designed to provide those who received such a opportunity a reason to pretend it didn't happen, or couldn't happen to an ordinary person.
And if doubt in the existence of The Almighty was both the problem and solution to living a moral life, or to attain heaven, I wondered if my own agnostic or atheistic leanings were a boon or an obstacle.
Or perhaps both.
Belief that by leaving the world a better place, we will be rewarded, and doubt that there a such a reward, but that we should leave the world a better place anyway.
Do right by those you encounter, not out of fear of eternal hell but because that is why The Almighty began the cycle of life millions of years ago which ultimately led to humanity.
------
For another short story with a religious theme, here is a link to
An Atheist For Christ
https://wurdsfromtheburbs.blogspot.com/2024/04/an-atheist-for-christ.html