Climbing, and Falling

I had read a brief account of famed free solo climber Alex Honnold's successful attempt to be the first to climb El Capitan without a rope.  Honnold's feat is both inspiring and a reality check, as he demonstrates what we are capable of, when we chase a dream with a single minded sense of determination, but also presents a stark realization that so many of the daily obstacles that we face and so often complain about are, in fact, inconsequential.

I watched the documentary last night, having taped it (sorry for that revelation of my age) over this past weekend.  While i was prepared for anxious even hair raising moments, and incredible scenic views, I was not prepared for the roller coaster emotions that Honnold's story evoked.  His relationships with his family, and his current girl friend, his ability to isolate the possibility of his death as an idea rather than as his physical ending, the feelings as portrayed by those in his life who both admired and feared for him practically every day, not to mention the aborted attempt to climb El Capitan in the fall of 2016 where he listened to his instincts and "bailed", all created a gut wrenching 2 hours of television.

The obvious fact that Honnold is different from most of us, not only in his perspectives about what is fun and what is challenging, but even in his basic concepts of what life is about, are revealed throughout the documentary through his reactions to his accidents in the year before his climb, his newfound love, and his seemingly nonchalant acceptance of the death of his colleagues, especially one in particular. 

We admire him for his focus, perhaps envy him for his ability to succeed, no matter how long it might take, yet also, perhaps, chalk it all up to someone who we can never be.  Someone who is willing to risk it all, at any particular moment, to achieve his goal.  Risk it all. 

Think about that.  Have you ever even contemplated risking it all, let alone actively pursued an action that entailed that very thing?

There are a few scenes in the film related to Alex and his girlfriend buying a house.  (Alex lived in his van for much of the previous decade).  They are walking through the empty house, envisioning how they will furnish it.  Later, they are shopping for a new refrigerator.  I found myself wondering how Alex could focus, or frankly care, about such decisions, when, in the forefront of his mind, he was always seeing the hundreds of moves he would have to make, in perfect succession, to climb that rock without falling, without dying.  Yikes!  I commented to my wife that I wondered if his girlfriend often thought about how she was caging a lion with talk of future domestic bliss. 

If Alex is the ultimate example of a person who understands that we get only one chance, so why not make the most of it, even if dying while doing what you love and are good at, is the price to be paid, what do we make of the thousands of Americans that have died in our current opioid crisis.  Do they possess the same DNA that makes everyday pleasures seem parochial?  Alex seems to move through his day with an understanding that the reward will come, but will take time.  It is certainly not instant gratification, as he reveals that he has thought about conquering El Cap for many years.  It is as if he can take all his need for that climbing high, let it out a bit at a time with "easy" climbs, knowing that the big high, the ultimate high, will come as long as he stays the course.  Contrast that with those who cannot move through life waiting for their next good feeling, but must experience it now. 

Of course, it is quite possible, perhaps inevitable, that Alex will die some day in his quest for the next ultimate high, just as so many addicts of opioids and other drugs die when chasing their next high.  Two sides of the same coin?  Perhaps though, the difference is that Alex has something to live, and die for, while addicts have nothing to live for which is why they pursue such a dead end path.

And what of America's path?  Is our country best reflected by Alex or the faceless victims of those who die of opioid abuse?  Is our true national emergency the soullessness of wealth accumulation?  Our willingness to tolerate all kinds of unethical behavior, policies which enable those with the most to treat those with less as non-human?  Is the fact that we are losing citizens to the ravages of drug dependency at rates 10, 20, even 25 times more than that of other "developed" countries, a sign of our climbing, or falling?

I would like to think that we are at a crossroads, and that we will make the right decisions in the next decade so that we are again a nation that is climbing.  Setting the bar higher, reaching for goals that might seem hard to achieve but can only be attained if we start the process, not give in to a defeatist belief that it is just too hard, or that we have not quite evolved enough yet.  Alex would never have stood atop El Cap if he had succumbed to those feelings at any time in the past decade.  His accomplishment was considered impossible not that long ago, even by those at the top of the rock climbing profession.

Climbing, risking it all, or falling, dying with spittle at the corners of our mouth, eyes bulging with the knowledge that life was wasted.  It is not as easy a decision as one might think, both individually and collectively as it assumes the risk of coming up short, not quite making it.  But oh, the joy of living an attempt that is greater than the everyday! 

I guess that is the question, to succeed in mediocrity or to risk failing while attempting greatness.  The question for each of us, and the question for America.