Thursday, April 7, 2022

Ego VS Selflessness

I caught the end of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty yesterday.  As it ended, I was struck with an idea about writing a blog concerning the topic of Ego and selflessness.  I assume that this thought came to me due to the scene at the end of the movie.  For those of you who have not seen this movie, I will not detail it here, but instead recommend you watch it when you get a chance.

The reason I thought a topic such as this might be interesting to explore, is that, as a writer (so proclaimed), it is difficult, if not impossible to separate one's ego from one's literary efforts.  After all, just the fact that a writer deems his/her ideas to be of enough significance to put them to paper, to attempt to not only share them with others, but to fashion in that attempt a message or specific meaning, is an exercise in letting loose the ego.  

While I imagine that it is possible for someone with low self esteem, or low sense of their own value, to write, or engage in any type of artistic endeavor, it takes a more developed sense of ego to share that work with others, to put it into the public arena, for good or bad.

Ego is often ridiculed in association with those who act or assume they are better than most everyone else.  There has always been a disdain by the everyday person for those who don't do the hard work that keeps society functioning, who exist in a world where the sheets are always clean, the food always hot and plentiful, the money always available to satisfy any whim, even though all those amenities and advantages are just there, with no effort.  To those of us not born in the lap of luxury, there is sometimes solace in believing that those people blessed with winning the birth lottery that provided for them most or all of their material needs, would not be able to survive the "real world", if not for their inherited advantages.

Yet a strong ego is also necessary to help drive those who innovate, those who think outside the box, those who fight against conventional thinking to create something novel.  Is it not partly ego (along with patriotism) that drives the Ukranian people to fight against overwhelming odds to remove the Russian army from its soil?  Not to mention, anyone who takes a scalpel in hand to operate on someone's brain.  

Ego as defined as a person's sense of self-esteem or self-importance, seems a critical attribute for an advancing society to desire in at least a reasonable percentage of its citizens.  We want to nurture that sense of self esteem in our children so they will see no obstacle as insurmountable, and in our nation as a whole so together we can solve any problem.  

Did it not take great faith in our collective abilities, or at least of those who worked for NASA in the 1960's, to believe that we could send a manned rocket to the moon when, at the time, we weren't even sure of the math to make the physics work?  

Yet, it is just as clear that ego without a portion of selflessness, can be a negative.  While we might admire a privileged person who volunteers in a soup kitchen, or who knows the first names of their employees, and those of their spouse and children, our admiration can be extinguished for those who have exchanged their humanity for money and possessions, for those who have long ago jettisoned the understanding that it is only when people as a whole benefit from great achievements that great ego helps mankind.  It does a country little good when a resurgence of national pride comes from the subjugation of the citizens of another nation, or the dehumanization of certain minorities within that country.

Whether you are Vladimir Putin or those legislators who are proposing laws which isolate the LGBTQ and transgender community, actions driven by an ego that has lost touch with its sense of humanity, or dare I say it, with the unfathomable creation plan which has generated the myriad of species, and variations within those species for us to experience, are actions that betray the very foundation of ego and self-esteem, by destroying that very same sense in its victims.

I have had a number of conversations with friends and family concerning my belief that 5% of people are assholes.  Often the discussion begins with a debate on that percentage, but I stand by that number, for now.  Unfortunately, assholes come in all shapes and sizes, all genders and races, all socio-economic levels, although I have a personal belief that as income increases, especially into the percentile of the richest 5%, the chances of one being an asshole improve dramatically.  Generally, discussions along this line lead to a debate of how many of those assholes are born that way (nature) or created through experience (nurture), but we always agree that if not for that 5%, life would be so much easier for the remaining 95% of people.  

Is this the true challenge for humanity as given us by the creator? To figure out how to handle the 5% who are assholes while still living positive lives individually, and leaving the world a better place, collectively?

Also, not only are there assholes all around us, but each of us behaves like an asshole, from time to time.  It is as if we all have the gene, and it can rear its ugly head on occasion, but happily it remains recessive most of the time, in most people.  Yet, like a virus, it can spread quickly among us when the conditions are ripe.  

For instance, these past 6 years have shown just how quickly a spark can release the gene within us.  Who could have thought 6 years ago, that so many people would let their selfishness shine so much, would demonstrate against learning the facts of our national history, or against wearing a mask during a pandemic?  Yet that is what we see all around us, as the result of that great orange asshole we once called president.  Someone whose ego is so lacking in selflessness, that he is willing to sacrifice our country's democratic principles to prove that he could not have possibly lost an election.  As if making America great again can be achieved by rampant selfishness when it is genuine selflessness as demonstrated by those brave Americans who gave their lives, literal and figurative, to the causes of freedom and equality. 

Hopefully, just as McCarthyism, which brought out the asshole in so many Americans in the 1950's, we will soon see the end of this particular era, either as people realize the damage their inhumanity is causing, or open their eyes to the danger that an ego without selflessness can cause to our democracy, and to each other. 

And, as for my struggle with controlling my own ego while still expressing my opinions, I will allow my occasional readers to judge how I am balancing the two.

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