7 Cakes in 7 Days

More than five decades ago, my parents discovered a place in the Bartonsville, Pennsylvania area which offered housekeeping cottages, and a pool, surrounded by woods.  Those first few years, we rented one of the smaller cabins, jamming three generations of family members into a two bedroom cottage.  We did not visit every year, in the beginning, but as our enjoyment of the area grew, other family members visited us, planting the seeds for what was to develop.

Over the years, our visits expanded to multiple weeks, in bigger cabins, and included various cousins, aunts, and uncles.  During those years, many new friendships were also born with families with multiple generations like ours.  While in many ways, our family was unique in that my parents had six children over the course of 22 years, we were not unique in seeking a place to go each summer to relax, play with other kids, and just be together.

Back then, there were very few places to purchase food, or take a meal out, which meant that my mother began squirreling away the paper and dry goods we would need for weeks in anticipation of the trip.  Then, in the early morning hours of the day of our departure, my dad would spend a considerable amount of time lashing the boxes and suitcases to the top of our station wagon.  When he finally finished we jumped into the car for the endless trip up 611, the highways of today not having been carved into the land yet.

My participation was brief, being the oldest, and being a young man who sought enjoyment outside the family unit, but my younger brothers and sister, spent the vast majority of their childhood summers looking forward to the 1, then 2, and even 3 weeks at the Poconos. 

As time passed, and I became a father, my wife and I began to bring our kids to visit my parents at this retreat, sometimes spending the week, sometimes only a weekend.  The bug soon infected my children who found pleasure in visiting with their cousins and spending time with their grandparents and various aunts and uncle.  Over time, they came to feel what my younger siblings felt, but which had eluded me as a teenager.  Eventually, a week at the Poconos also became a yearly rite for us as well.

In the meantime, we slowly took over the string of cottages which compose Countryside Cottages, expanding our usage to roughly half of the cabins while establishing a hold on the same week(s) every year so that we were vacationing with the same people in those cabins not occupied by us.  We had expanded our reach beyond blood lines to include members of other families who had continued their yearly trek, many of which had also begun in those years spanning the 70's and 80's.

Through the years, we drank endless quantities of alcoholic beverages by the pool, discussed the events of the day in voices that often became raised or excited, played games in and around the pool, and ate countless meals together, sometimes at the pool, sometimes in a huge gathering at one of the cabins, and sometimes in smaller groups at the local diners and restaurants.  Then at night, despite, or perhaps because of the arguments which may have punctuated the daytime, we gathered at one of the cabins to slaughter some more brain cells, play all sorts of card, board, and verbal games, laugh, remember, and create the memories we would recount the following years. 

This past year, which just ended today, included all 6 siblings, my dear mother, one aunt, 4 spouses of the 5 boys, 10 grandchildren, including the spouse and fiance of 2 of those, our cousin and her husband, various one day visitors, and even one ex-wife who came to participate in a baby shower for the wife of her son.  Conspicuous in his absence, as he has been for the past 7 years, was my dad who passed in 2012, but as many people have commented, my middle brother looks more and more like him every year, reminding us of the patriarch of this event.

And the cakes?

Well, as is typical of my mother, she makes sure that she recognizes each of her family members, as they reach certain milestones of their lives.  This year featured an 80th birthday cake, a 60th birthday cake, an engagement cake, the aforementioned baby shower cake plus an accompanying cheesecake, a 50th birthday cake, and in no small feat, a surprise 85th birthday cake for my mom, who handled it with her typical aplomb by saying it wasn't necessary, and then helping to serve each and every person a slice of what was the best chocolate cake of the week.

There was a time when I worried that when the day came and my mother no longer graced us with her presence, that this family event may break down, as we all know that mom is the glue that holds us all together.  But, happily, my youngest brother and his family have embraced this area, making upwards of 10 visits a year.  In addition, the young adults of the family who have not begun families, continue to share in the family joy, and the younger children of the six siblings have internalized their parents love of the Poconos, so I no longer worry about the longevity of the event.

There is much talk of the disintegration of the family unit.  We scatter to the wind to find love, jobs, happiness, often limiting contact with our siblings and parents to weddings, and funerals.  We too easily excuse why we can't see our relatives, using the pressures of our hectic lives, and the wedges that continued absence from one another creates as reasons.  Even our extended family, despite this wonderful yearly get together, includes people whom I could pass on the street tomorrow and not recognize. 

In the end, it takes effort and usually just one incredible person to make it their purpose to see a family stay in touch.  For us, my mother is that person, someone who organized so many family events that I would not be able to calculate the number.  But more importantly, someone who impressed on all those who know her, especially her direct family, the importance of family. 

So often we bemoan the lack of heroes in our time.  When you find yourself uttering such thoughts, think about the person in your family who has done the most to keep you in touch and in contact.  That is your hero.  And, should there not be one, take on the mantle yourself so that someday a niece or grandchild will be able to recount the story of your family's togetherness as reflected in your own particular version of our yearly vacation in the Poconos.